So long Mad Men

So last night was the Mad Men finale. I don’t really know what to think about it. Mad Men is a very subtle show, so nothing huge or extraordinary happens. It’s a show about the fine details, so I’m not used to that. I want big outrageously happy endings. I wanted Don to come home, see all the characters get together, reminisce about the past, Don having heart to hearts with Betty and his kids. A lot of mush. But that never ever happens on Mad Men so I have to change the way I see things.

I thought everyone’s storylines wrapped nicely, besides Don’s. Peggy and Pete had just the right kind of goodbye. Peggy and Pete. Wow if you watch the first episodes, their dynamic was so different. Pete was a total douchebaggg. Thankfully, recently he seemed to have changed and wanted to be something else. He went from thinking Peggy was a just a stupid girl he could step all over (and toy with), to someone he really looked up to. That’s pretty amazing.

“Someday people are going to brag that they worked with you”

“God…I don’t know what to say.”

“I wouldn’t know. No one’s ever said it to me.”

Peggy, she went from being Don’s secretary, constantly being trampled by the men of Sterling Cooper, to a top creative director. That’s very inspirational. She also found someone to be with finally, Stan. Didn’t really picture them together. Thought they were better off as friends, and I thought it came sort of left field, but the telephone conversation when Stan just transitioned from regular Stan to pouring-out-my-love-for-you Stan was pretty romantic actually. Peggy’s reaction was so hilarious because she was soo taken aback by the declaration of love.

“I think how about you came into my life, how you drove me crazy. Now I don’t know what to do with myself, because all I wanna do is be with you”

“….What? What did you just say?”

“I want to be with you. I’m in love with you”


“I love you Peggy”

“…..oh my God. That’s what I thought you said. I-I-I..I don’t know what to say. I can’t breathe..” etc etc

Joan also got the ending she deserved. Her boyfriend didn’t like how she was so driven to work, so he left her. But she took it in stride and started her own company. Joan and Peggy’s meet-up was just right. I also liked how Joan and Roger met one last time. Two former lovers, now they were just two good friends (who share a kid) and were happy for each other.

My favorite character on the show…is Sally. The actress, Kiernan Shipka (aka Jinora on Avatar!) started on the show soo young. She was this cute little kid. And now she’s this teenager. She showed a lot of maturity in the last episode, telling Don what was the best for her brothers after Betty’s death, coming home and helping Bobby make dinner, and God that last scene where she’s cleaning the dishes with her mom at the table, who was smoking away till the end. It was such an ordinary scene. You’d never think that Betty was dying at the time. Life goes on I guess.

That was the last piece of Betty. There was no dramatic death scene or funeral. You just know she will die, which makes it more depressing actually. Her other scene was when Don called her. Ah that was another moment. I always thought they would make such a  good couple, but Don was just so damn terrible. And she’s pretty reserved herself so their marriage was just so bland. Sad that it couldn’t work, but at least they became good friends by the end.

I liked how the episode was called “Person to Person.” Apparently back in the day, when you called someone, the operator would say something like a “I have a request for a person to person for betty francis by don draper.” The two times he called was to Betty and Peggy, the only two women he had a close bond with that wasn’t one of his love affair women. So it was fitting.

SO my main issue…was Don. He went off to California with his fake niece, and then ended up at a hippie retreat with her. He didn’t want to go there but ended up being stranded there. And then he just had this meltdown (which he has had in the past). He was moved by what a man at a group session said, something about…God I didn’t even know what. I guess how he felt unnoticed, or couldn’t understand when people tried to love him. It was very vague maybe because I could not relate to that at all. I wanted to sympathize but I just didn’t really get it. I never ever understood Don really. So he had a crappy childhood. Ok a lot of people do. And we all have those days when we so alone, ignored, isolated, empty. But that doesn’t mean you get to be mean, grumpy, mysterious and neglect your wife and kids. Never ever ok.

I really wanted him to change. I wanted the show to show the change. But nothing new really happened until the last very ending scene. He’s sitting down and his instructor says something about becoming a new person, says om, and then Don repeats , and then he smiled to himself. And then black. And I’m like no freaking away. He says om and all of a sudden he gets the purpose of his life?? Or something?? I don’t know…it’s so vague. More than 40s of years and all of sudden it just clicked. I really wanted more buildup. I wanted him to face his issues while they are happening around him and not at a very distant retreat. 

But that wasn’t the last part. The very last thing was this old 70s coke ad that was well known for its multicultural slant apparently. So basically…it seems like Don was behind this (real) famous ad. Don had always wanted to do an ad for coke so one can extrapolate that Don went back home a new man, and ended up pitching one of greatest ads of all time.

I will say that despite my overall irritation with Don and that last hippie thing that made him all of a sudden realize stuff, the ad’s placement was a huge sign of hope for his character. It signaled renewal. Like a phoenix rising out of the ashes. So I’d like to that Don went back a different, better person. Someone who will take his work seriously and not run away from his problems. Someone who will be there for his loved ones when they need him. Knowing who he was for the past 7 seasons, that’s very inspirational. It’s actually motivating me to work harder for whatever I want to do in life, who I want to become.

Well I should go back to work. I have two patient interviews tomorrow so need to review the usual round of questions.

Currently listening to When You Give Your Heart by Laura Veirs. It’s one of those cute indie songs that make me happy.

Ahh I just took a shower and now I’m in my room with a cool afternoon breeze. I love hearing kids in the park. Makes being inside (ironically) more bearable. Although I wish I could be out and not do work. Having the right music on is also key. Alexandre Desplat doesn’t disappoint with his calm piano music (Coco Avant Chanel soundtrack). I just want summer vacation to be here. I counted that I have 54 free days and I wanna make sure each day counts. Because after this summer, I’ll never be able to catch a break until I’m like….60.

Anyway, I realized I totally lied about this past week. I did so some extra stuff. Monday was a memorial service to the families of our donor bodies.  I really loved the part when the family members spoke about their passed loved ones. I was tearing up uncontrollably, and was just hoping the nose would not get very runny! It was strange hearing about these people who led their lives, and now they were gone, and we students have a totally different experience with them. One girl, who was I think like a 4th year at school, opened saying (along the lines of this) “my grandmother was a mother, an aunt, a friend, a sister…but she was born to be a grandmother” (blow to the heart). Another pair of old siblings read poems their mother wrote (some about dying actually), and spoke of the all her years filled with loving others. And the first speaker, spoke of her aunt who was a neuropharmacologist and was also a hippie back in the day, but also was a schizophrenic and dealt with substance abuse issues. It was a poignant description of someone who was so very missed by her family.

We had a couple singers. One was alright, but we could barely here her with all this weird speaker noise. And I later learned she was hired…Then Soumya sang Hallelujah (Shrek version), which was, not surprisingly, amazingg. It was so peaceful and beautiful.

Tuesday afternoon, I had really wanted to go see the cherry blossoms again. I had never seen them in full pink bloom in the main area. On my birthday, they just started blooming, so they were still pretty bare. So I went after anatomy lab. I really should have given myself more time to get there. In my head, it seems like it’ll take 20 minutes. Ended unlike 35. But I wanted to get back by 6 for Coffeehouse, so I could only stay at the park for like 15 minutes. To my disappointment, the trees were completely green. All the pink had fallen =(. There’s always next year I suppose…

Pink or not pink, it was so nice to just be there. So peaceful and serene. They had Japanese peonies out, which were beautiful. I wish I could’ve hung out more, but wanted to get back to school for Coffeehouse.

Coffeehouse is when we get served cake and coffee and we just hang, talk, play board games set out. It was the first one that was outside in awhile so that was nice. We stayed out for hours…and then Rahima and Soumya tell me they are finally going to see the Parenthood series finale. I already saw it a few months ago, but I was totally down for re-watching it, because God that show is beautiful. If you want to watch a show that’s about the real world, day to day lives of ordinary people (no sexy spies or thrillers or affiars) this is the show for you. I really should do a post about the show. I need to analyze my love for all the characters. But anyway, we watched it, we shed many tears, and called it a late night (think it was like almost 3 o’ clock?).

The next day I believe, I got back to work.

Yesterday we thankfully did not have POPs in the afternoon (when we do our cases for like 2 hours–but we never actually do anything). So after lecture on the way home, I went to Uniqlo because they had a black shirtdress that I really wanted to get. Also got white skinny jeans. The material is pretty thin, even for a black dress, but the lighting in the fitting room is pretty dim. When I got home, I saw that it was very see through in a well lit area so I’m not so sure about keeping it. My hijab can cover the see through bra area…but I can’t tell if the rest of my body is visible too…I did find a thicker black shirtdress at Mango for like the same price, so I ordered that online. I hope it actually fits. I spent like an hour measuring myself and hoping I’m getting the right size. I’ll be pissed if it’s not! Ps I never order clothes online without having tried them, so it’s a first.

I also tried the mini frap at Starbucks. Now that was a very handy frap size. They should totally just continue it.

Nothing else was new for this week. I just studied or was wrapping up television shows that are ending for the season. Arrow’s was ok, thought the ending could have been better. Good Wife was ok too. Once Upon a Time’s I really enjoyed! For once. Since season 1, the show has lost its mystery and just became cutesy, but from the episode about Cruella Deville, it’s been very interesting.

So Once Upon a Time has never had a truly evil character. All villains have been shown to have a vulnerable, human side. They were just mistreated some point in their life. But Cruella…that girl was actually…evil!! Like pure evil! The whole episode you think she’s this innocent girl who is locked up by her evil mom who killed her father. Turns out…Cruella killed her father and stepfathers. Her mother just had no idea what to do with her! Cruella liked…to kill. It reminded me of Cathy from East of Eden. Just pure evil from childhood. I wonder if this actually happens in real life…or it’s just fiction. I’ve always believed kids to be innocent, even if they do bad stuff, they don’t really realize. But kids who actually know what they’re doing…? Anyway, thought that episode was cool and the finale was really cool. Hope next season keeps this up.

My favorite though, which I saw yesterday, was SHIELD’s!! Oh. My. God. It was CRAZY. I was screaming every other minute. I haven’t watched something so suspenseful in I don’t know how long. I think every character was about to die in each scene. It was just 2 hours of freakin brilliance. Gah the fight scene, they are so badass. Can’t wait for what season 3 brings.

There’s one thing that disturbs me on SHIELD. It’s Ward…The actor is so freaking HOT. But his character has become such a psychopath I hate him. Yet I find him so damn attractive. UGH. I hate myself. At least the actor is a nice guy. I’ll just think that.

And lastly, I saw the penultimate episode of Mad Men. Damn, right before the end, they hit you so hard. Betty has lung cancer. And she’s months away from dying. I did not see that coming. I…ugh, Betty was one of my favorite characters. Not that she’s like an amazing person, but I found her interesting. And she’s just gorgeous as hell…I was being delusional and hoping the finale would show the characters in the future, now, old people. But now Betty cannot be part of that reality. And it was so heartbreaking seeing Francis and Sally be torn up by the news. Especially Sally, she needs her mother!! She’s just like what 14 15? It’s just so sad. Betty wasn’t ever going to win mom of the year award, and her life with Don was just a mess, and she just had these weird things about her. But she’s definitely become more headstrong since her first days where she played the subservient, quiet beautiful wife. She’s more than that now. And that’s how she’s taking all this in very calmy. She’s content with herself.

Sally I always worried about you, because you marched to the beat of your own drum. But now I know that’s good. I know your life will be an adventure.

I love you. Mom.

The adventure part kills me. The thought of going through life without having your parents there to see it with you just breaks my heart. *sigh*

bettydraperfloraldress 640_Mad_Men_Betty_Season_2_Dress

Well the series finale is tomorrow. Today I watched the one episode of Mad Men that I completely missed somehow (the only one where Joan and Roger were actually together, how the hell did I miss that?). It was an episode of season 1, so it was interesting to contrast the show then and now. It’s so different. The characters have changed, I’d say for the better. Except for Don himself. Damn, that guy. He’s such an engima. He always had this dark attitude that has somewhat subsided. But he could be better. I can’t stand it when he’s with his women. I wonder how he’ll take Betty’s news.

Well this post pretty much proved I have no life but to study and watch television. Well after tomorrow, there’s nothing except the handful of GoT episodes. Today I went back in time and did GI embryology. What fun. Embryology is very interesting, but a pain to learn because you cannot get that stuff down without lots of videos and animations. Tomorrow, my goal is to somehow, miraculously, finish up all the GI stuff completely (we ended that like 3 weeks ago and I’m so behind!!). But I need to get through it somehow. We started reproductive this week, and it’ll end in 2 weeks, then right after we have finals.

Birthday Happenings

I haven’t had such a good day like last Tuesday in such a long time!! Tuesday we only had one class in the morning, which ended like 12, so we had the rest of the day left for hanging out (They originally scheduled another afternoon class but it was canceled). I was caught off guard by the end of class, when Danny was like “…I think we all have something to say” and I was like wait what do we have to say? And then they all started singing happy birthday to me. And then Sylvia took out these cute cupcakes she made! They were chocolate cupcakes with mocha icing that was swirled nicely on top. My carrell really is the best!

After class we went over to Grand Army Plaza (via train). The weather was PERFECTION! I didn’t have to wear a coat at all. I was praying for that kind of weather. I was so worried it would be rainy and everything would be blah.

So who were with me…Rahima, Soumya, Arifa, Dawn, Sylvia, Tasnima, and then Shila met us at the restaurant. Shila’s timing was perfect! She thought she would be a bit late (coming all the way from the Bronx), but she got there like 3 minutes after us.

We ended up getting like 4 different pizzas and they were do delicious! The first one was the best. But I can’t remember what the hell was actually on them. Would love to go back there another day.

After Pizza, we went to Ample Hills, a really well known ice cream place in the area (and Brooklyn?). My carrel peeps were actually going to eat at another restaurant in the area called Zaytoon’s, but it wasn’t halal so it wasn’t an option for me. But we wanted to meet up at some point since we were near each other. And then another excellent timing moment came. While we were walking down the street with the store in our sight, I saw Carrel G people crossing the street from their restaurant to the ice cream place.

I wasn’t in the mood for ice cream, but ended up sharing one with Shila. It was coffee flavored with oreo cookies. I liked it — wasn’t too sweet. I caught up a bit with my carrel friends and then we headed out for the Botanical Gardens to see the cherry blossoms. It was Tuesday, and the garden is free so it was pretty packed with people. But God it was so nice to be in such a beautiful setting. I could forget I was living in a crazy city.

Right at the entrance another great timing moment happened. I ran right into my friend Arlene, who I met at Sloan-Kettering last year. We worked in the same mini organization. Andd it was also her birthday! So we birthday buddies caught up for a few minutes, took pictures.

Most of the time at the cherry blossoms was taken trying to get really nice pictures of ourselves, which was albeit, taking away from appreciating the scenery really well. Dawn, Tasnima, and Shila had to leave, and the rest of us later just went to main tree area and sat around. It was so beautiful and peaceful!! I didn’t want to leave. Sylvia and Arifa left a bit earlier than us to grab some Starbucks. Rahima, Soumya and I hung out a little longer, attempting to take a selfie with an camera. The park was closing at 6 so the security guard was telling everyone to leave. I really want to go back there this week because the cherry blossoms in the main area hadn’t bloomed that much last week, but now they are at peak bloom so I definitely want to see that (didn’t get to see last year either).

After we got back to the dorms, a couple hours later, we were getting ready for part 2…making and eating cake! Alas we were so damn tired and it took so long that it ran past midnight. But we did make the cake. It was 2 layered (cake mix -no time for complete scratch). The top was regular yellow cake, the bottom was devil cake. And then in the middle was the kicker…homemade whipped cream filling with crushed oreos. It was delicious! Rahima and I frosted the cake that night. The next night on Wednesday, I got pink frosting and used my new frosting tips to attempt pretty decorations. They weren’t so bad for my first try ever. Sylvia came right before all the girls came and nicely wrote Happy Birthday out.

All the girls came at 10, and we hung out for like 45 minutes. They really liked the cake! It was nice just to hang out with all my friends. Twas a great way to end the birthday celebrations. My main goal was to have fun (I coined Tuesday as Fun Day!). I didn’t care it was my birthday, but I just wanted to enjoy myself as I hadn’t done anything in a long time. I actually find the birthday spotlight awkward…everyone just saying Happy Birthday!! as if you accomplished something so huge, when really, every other force but you, brought you into existence. But birthdays are a great way to take a break from life and take in all that’s around you.

And now sadly, I’m back to work =( Read a lot over the weekend. Today have to start thyroid stuff. Funn

Also, Happy Star Wars Day!! May the forcee be with you!


Ahh I wish the weekends were longer. There is not enough time in the world.

I managed to be productive for the most part… I made a huge list of stuff I needed to learn, and I always think I’ll be able to do it. But that never happens. My main fault is thinking I can do everything, when it is actually impossible. I only got like 3 things off the list. Now had I studied this week, I would’ve been ahead, but of course, I got distracted by randomness.

Yesterday was pancreas and liver day. Today I finished up learning about the Hepatitis viruses. And yet, there is so much more. Tomorrow we officially start endocrine, so I wish I had finished all of GI, but nope. I doubt I’ll get any work done this week so I feel very screwed at the moment.

I’ve been feeling a tad tense this weekend. In between the stressful work load and my horrendously messy messy messy house and thinking about Tuesday aka fun day, I end up not being so productive. I really hope Tuesday is a nice day. I want blue skies and sunshine! I hope lunch goes ok, but finding a place to eat is too damn annoying. Planning is annoying. We haven’t gone out and hung out in such a long time, and after this week, there will be no time for any fun, because finals are at the end of May. So I just want a really good day, when we can all just forget we’re dying in school and other things on our mind.

Today I went out to Michael’s and got a few cake decorating items, like a frosting tip and disposable bags. Plus a thing called a coupler. All three together will help to make pretty flowers on a cake we’re baking Tuesday.

That’s another thing. After making the successful oreo cupcakes, I just want to go to the next level! I want to make the most beautiful cakes, and now I watch videos of pretty mouth watering cakes instead of reading on liver disease. After all these years, I still don’t learn how to focus. 

I’m going to leave in a few hours to go back to the dorm. Then I have to do a homework assignment, and then I don’t know, maybe I’ll study, but I probably won’t be in the mood. Maybe I’ll watch Game of Thrones. I do need to get out this place though. This house is just such a wreck. I need a more aesthetically nice place to study.